Free Forms winner page 1997

-DRAWING OF COMEDY SCENE-Winner: January 1997

From: Jason Burrows - buzby(at)

B: Look at what you've done to my axe.

A: You ungrateful cone head. I gave it to you for Christmas last year and you haven't used it once.

-DRAWING OF COMEDY SCENE-Winner: February 1997

From: Mark Murdock - Murdock(at)

A. I've been pounding on your door ALL NIGHT!

B. Yes, and I'll be honest,
you're way off tempo.


From: Steve Werner - stevew5(at)

A. Do you use sunscreen?

B. Absolutely! If I don't,
I get so sunburned I look like lipstick!!!

Additional wisdom from Steve: "One world, one people, one heart, one love........
seperate checks!" :)


From: Gary Cheski - cheskig(at)

A. How can you expect that to start, when it's not plugged in?

B. Plugged in?! That explains why the gas I added keeps leaking out.

Editor's note: What I really had in mind when I did the drawing was the following--

A. How do you expect to get your car in the garage with that tree in the middle of your driveway?

B. No problem! we are a two motorcycle family.


Editor's note: This month the entries were so good that I was forced to choose two winners. Sorry, you'll have to share the prize.

Winner #1, from: Citizen X - mwmz(at)

A. Oh no, I can't believe it!
B. Great you made me travel millions of light years, and they're not even on-line with the latest version of Netscape!

Winner #2,
from: Murdock, Mark RB-4359 - Murdock(at)

A. It must be capable of transmitting signals to the edge of the Universe!
B. Yep, biggest N-tenna I've ever seen.


Winner #1, from: Murdock Mark - Mark.Murdock(at)Unisys.Com

A. Another Apple! We must be sittin' over a mess of MacIntoshes. B. Yep, these days, you only find 'em in schools.

Winner #2
, from: Citizen X - mwmz(at)

B. Catch anything good?
A. Nope, hardly any bytes.


Winner #1, from: Murdock Mark - Mark.Murdock(at)Unisys.Com

A. Stonehendge must have been an ancient computer, look, a scuzzy port!
B. Of course! The ancient Druids must have used rock matrix printers.

Winner #2
, from: Steve W - stevew5(at)

B. Hey, you said we were going to "CONEHendge"?
A. Oops!

-DRAWING OF COMEDY SCENE-Winners August 1997

Winner #1, from: Gary Cheski - cheskig(at)

A. I like your new pet. What's his name?
B. I call him Rover. He's not trained, though. He's always sniffing, digging...and watch out if he lifts up one wheel!

Winner #2
, from: Domenic Panetta - Domen8r(at)Uwindsor.Ca

A. Listen up son, we don't want them to know there's any
intelligence on this planet.
B. Then you better do the talking Dad.

Honorable mentions-

From: Peter Schooff - jacopete(at)

A. Well, aren't you going to introduce us?
B. Sure...Rock, meet Roll.

From: Wendy & Wally Warwick - clown.central(at)

A. What do I do if it pokes me again?
B. No matter what, don't move.

From: Remking(at)

A. Whew, Guess I won't need that jump start after all, the tow truck has finally arrived.
B. Yeah, and it only took a few thousand millennium!!

From: Domenic Panetta - Domen8r(at)Uwindsor.Ca

A. I told you son, no pets!
B. But Dad, he followed me home from school, his name's Rover.

-DRAWING OF COMEDY SCENE-Winner September 1997

Winner #1, from: Murdock Mark - Mark.Murdock(at)Unisys.Com

A. You've heard of Fall of the House of Usher haven't you?
B. I think so...
A. Well, this is Rise of the House of Escher!

Second prize
, from: Domenic Panetta - Domen8r(at)Uwindsor.Ca

A. Finally, man's first perpetual motion machine.
B. No, my mother-in-law's mouth was definitely the first one.

-DRAWING OF COMEDY SCENE-Winner for October 1997

<--Text at top of drawing- The year: 7057 - Two archaeologists have just uncovered an artifact from an ancient unknown civilization.

First prize
, from: Paul Heisel - lpheisel(at)

B. Hey! Maybe if I rub it I'll get three wishes!
A. You could, but you'd probably just get two and have to drive back to get the other.

Second prize
, from: Mirko Schulze - Ingely.Rutten(at)

A. What do you think this is?
B. I don't know, maybe it's got something to do with that clown we dug up yesterday.

Third prize,
from: Robert Palma - rpalma(at)

(A) Oh boy ! After all these centuries! Is this what I think it is ?
(B) Yea , We've found Jimmy Hoffa!

Honorable mentions-

From: Gary Cheski - garyc_(at)

A. What do you think this could be?
B. I don't know but I suddenly have the urge to put it in a white paper bag and drive away.

-DRAWING OF COMEDY SCENE-Winners November 1997

First prize, from: Mirko Schulze - Ingely.Rutten(at)

A. Somehow our competitors always know exactly what we are going to do.
B. They're taking me out again tonight, so if I'm not too drunk I'll ask them about it.

Second prize
, from: Robert Palma - rpalma(at)

A. As you can see people, this year business has gone so low We've gone right off the chart ? Does anyone have any suggestions ?
B. Yes Boss! Next year we can buy a longer chart! This way we can go twice as low !

Honorable mention
, from: Domenic Panetta - domen8r(at)

A. You mean to tell me this is an accurate reflection of our revenue for the year!
B. No Sir. To truly reflect our revenue I would have had to tack on a roll of toilet paper.

-DRAWING OF COMEDY SCENE-Winners for December 1997

First prize
, from: J. Branyan - jbranyan(at)

A. See! I told you that's what would happen.
B. You were right. Okay Harry, take off the wool socks.

Second prize, from: Domenic Panetta - domen8r(at)

A. Are you o.k. Fred?
B. Let this be a lesson guys, never use a punch bowl as a bird bath.

Third prize, from: MJONES(at)BHAMWEEKLY.COM

B. Uhh, whatcha doing Bernie?
A. Trying to remember my recipe for upside down cake.

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